i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
