I feel like I'm in dance class right now
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize