there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
