I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
