I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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