my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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