If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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