sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
As shirtless as possible
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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