yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
