I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
