so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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