you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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