Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
