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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
