I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize