the new term for farting is butt boxing.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
