ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Randomize
