I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
