if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
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