Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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