I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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