Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
