The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
