So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Randomize
