I'm laying in your front yard are you home
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Randomize
