I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize