Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
love makes seman taste better
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
she pinky promised me she was 18
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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