Joe is yelling at the trees again.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
You're like the curious george of whores
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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