You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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