I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
