you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Sext me about skeletons
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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