I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
