You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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