This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
