I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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