i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I think people are normalizing furries
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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