can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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