so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
