$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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