My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
