I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
