Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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