Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
