He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
i will never coherently bang her
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
