You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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