can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
She's the barista slut.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
