K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
