come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Why is your signature on my underwear?
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Randomize
