Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
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