You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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