uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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